A little over a week ago, I went to see the Britten War Requiem which was being performed at the school that I work for. It is undoubtedly one of the great requiems in the musical tradition and has been difficult for me to get it out of my head since the conert.

Britten was comissioned to write the piece to dedicate Coventry Cathedral, which has been destroyed in World War II and was to be rebuilt. Britten, a pacifist, wrot the requiem, using the full Mass texts intersperced with poetry written by Wilfred Own, a soldier in WWI (who was killed a week before the end of the war). The consequent piece is the most dramatic and emotionally charged attacks on the institution of war in human society that I have ever encountered. Every poem underscores the absurdity of war and its ultimate futility. Britten artfully mixes the poetry in with the latin texts for an extremely powerful effect. Musically the piece is a spectacular modern, dissonant and atonal meandering structure. It is surprisingly listenable but yet still qiute profound. I particularly liked the part where the Dies Irae was introduced by the Trumpet and trombone sections playing horn calls that mimicked at the same time the bugle call of the cavalry and also the call of the Last Judgment. War is Hell. Literally.

I have never considered myself a pacifist. I do not like violence or condone it (outside of video games and movies of course ) but cannot categorically say that I am opposed to all violence at all times. I’m very torn on this position. In studying German history in my years studying German, I learned a lot about the evils that humanity is possible of achieving. WWI and WWII encompas both of these and in a sense are the dialectic of violence. World War I was the quo et demonstratem of pacifism.

So Abram rose, and clave the wood, and went,
And took the fire with him, and a knife.
And as they sojourned both of them together,
Isaac the first-born spake and said, My Father,
Behold the preparations, fire and iron,
But where the lamb for this burnt-offering?
Then Abram bound the youth with belts and straps,
And builded parapets and trenched there,
And streched forth the knife to slay his son.
When lo! and angel called him out of heaven,
Saying, Lay not thy hand upon the lad,
Neither do anything to him. Behold,
A ram, caught in a thicket by its horns;
Offer the Ram of Pride instead of him.
But the old man would not so,
but slew his son, -
And half the seed of Europe, one by one.

The first world war war underscored the pointlessness of war in general. Why were these particular youths who had nothing against these other particular youths killing each other over disagreements that other unrelated leaders had with each other? It was all so pointless and evil. World War I I think represents the evil that humanity is capable of even when it is not trying to be evil.

World War II on the other hand represents what humanity can do when it does try to be evil, and I think it is the counterexample to the pacifist. The Allies were by no means saints going into save the Jews from the death camps, and many of their motivations and tactics were by no means honorable. Yet still, when you go to one of the concentration camps or study the history of Nazi germany you quickly come to the conclusion that this had to be stopped and by force.

Links:

• War Requiem Text
• Some Background on the Requiem

Having been raised in a series of relatively conservative churches and gone to a liberal arts college, I find myself as a Christian in a bit of a paradox. I am thoroughly convinced of the truth of Christianity and well equipped to understand and defend it. I see and affirm the value of the orthodox beliefs and practices that unite Christians across space of time in this thing we call the Body of Christ.

And yet…

And yet, something in my conception of ‘church’ seems missing. I found this at college where I met people who were super active and excited about helping the poor, the needy, the oppressed. I found people who sought deeper meaning and were always questioning and re-examining their beliefs and thoughts, lest they had made some error and invited falshood into their understanding. I encountered a richness and life that paled my high school youth group. This was not limited either to the ‘secular’ part of campus. In fact, my fellowship seemed to be on the forefront of issues of race, oppression, social justice and through them I found a richness in my Christian heritage that I had never seen before.

How did I miss this? How could I have read the Bible cover-to-cover, supposedly under the principle that its existence was intimately tied in with the voice of God, and missed so much? I have begun to feel that there is something missing in the world of church that I had before college. I go back to my church from high school and feel like there is an energy and life that is missing there.

In short, I am emerging. I am caught in the paradox of affirming the incubator that raised me, and yet feeling its gross inadequacies. Apparently, I am not alone. There is an entire community of people like me, coming from all sorts of backgrounds who feel like Christianity has become often stagnant in the modern (or rather postmodern) age and that something must be done. What this ‘something’ is unclear, but a conversation has emerged as to how we must change in order to continue to best strive towards the ideal laid out by Christ.

‘Conversation really seems to be one of the best ways of describing this ‘movement.’ The growth of the ‘social web’ (or to use the buzzword – Web 2.0) has made for an ideal ground for individuals, leaders, theologians, authors, and skeptics to share thoughts, ideas and exercise this conversation. This blog is my own little participation in this endeavor. My prayer is that it will be useful and informative to all who read it (and to its writer) as I attempt to struggle to find understanding, truth and meaning in a complex world.